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‘I AM’ in Silence

Joy being in Silence I AMSilence – the sweet sweet state of Being that just seems to elude me.

Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj shared that he discovered his ‘I AM’ when his teacher asked him to just focus on his ‘I AM’ in whatever he did, as well as to use his spare time to sit in silence, and just focus on ‘I AM’.

Whilst there are countless different paths to discover, embody and work from ‘I AM’, spiritual and non spiritual, I was intrigued by his method and discipline in discovering and Being in ‘I AM’. So I made a resolution to Be in Silence with ‘I AM’.

However, when I looked around my chosen way of living, which is world’s apart to Sri Nisargadatta, I just could not work out how to embrace his discipline and self mastery of silence to Be in ‘I AM’. My lifestyle is constantly bombarded by external noise from emails, the web, social media, television as well as family, social and professional engagements. These do not even come close to the amount of noise generated in my own mind – constant white noise of swirling thoughts – of past events, future predictions, solutions to problems, anxieties – the never ending list.Silence is Clear

The few times that I could will myself past the internal and external noise into the soft buttery embrace of silence, I was struck by the crystal clarity of the soft whispers of ‘I AM’. Solutions to seemingly insurmountable problems come so easily; fears and anxieties just melt away; I feel more centred, balanced and aligned. Just a few moments in the silence of ‘I AM’ replenishes my energy drained by the incessant internal and external noise.

Whilst it is the simplest, most joyous experience to Be in the silence of ‘I AM’, my challenge was to transcend the noise into embody my ‘I AM’. I do take a couple of moments during the day to meditate and I have thought about participating in the many wonderful silent retreats around, but I wanted to find a way where I could constantly Be in silence in amongst the Noise around and within me, with my chosen lifestyle.

What I have found that has helped me:

  1. Meditate in the silence of the morning to reconnect with the divine part within, my ‘I AM’ – before engaging in any form of external communication. This enables me to be aligned and centred with ‘I AM’ the entire day
  2. During the day, the alignment and centre that I established in the morning enables me to flow with ‘I AM’ with all that I do. I am able to hear the soft whispers and guidance of ‘I AM’ over and above the loud shouts of my thoughts and emotions, and the external noise.
  3. By staying strong and focused with the resonance of ‘I AM’ throughout the whole day, I can maintain stronger boundaries, and I only attract whatever is in resonance with my ‘I AM’ vibrations. Bliss.
  4. Before I go to bed, I allow myself all the time to allow any built up or suppressed thoughts or emotions of the day to flow freely out of my energetic bodies – either through breathing, blowing or visualising them out. Once generated, these energies need to be discharged.
  5. Just before I sleep, I journey to my ‘I AM’ centre, and there I fall asleep.

Once I started this process, I am finding that TV channels, books, websites and genres that do not resonate now have automatically lost their desirability. What I like and dislike, and who I spend time with has changed quite dramatically. Friends and family who do not resonate with my new way of Being either slip away or change to a resonance compatible with my ‘I AM’.

The more I repeat this process, the easier and less time it takes to fully embrace and embody my ‘I AM’ resonance.

Slowly the internal noise of my thoughts and emotions, as well as the external noise that I choose to engage echo with whispered message from ‘I AM’.Silence of One Voice

Within the Silence of ‘I AM’, there is no conflict – just the one unified voice.



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‘I AM’ Unconditional Love

Break free of ChainsOne of the most powerful regression sessions I had was when I was a student in the Past Life Regression Academy course nearly 10 years ago.

I went back to a life where I was born a female with no cognitive capacity. Seeing that something was ‘wrong’ with their child, my parents left me on the Church steps. I grew up orphan and the village clown/idiot. It did not bother me because I did not understand it. I was quite attractive and many men had their way with me. Again, did not understand it so it did not bother me. Then, one of the men impregnated me – and whilst I did not understand that I had a baby growing within – for the first time, I felt love – love that this child had for me, and love that I had for the child. It was blissful. I spent all my time basking in love.

I started to show. Whilst I did not know nor cared about what was happening, the villagers knew I was pregnant. Their philosophy was that the Devil’s Spawn cannot bear another Spawn – so they beat the baby out of me. The physical pain of the beating and abortion was no match for the emotional and mental agony of losing the love. I did not understand that my baby had died. All I knew was that there was no more love. The villagers shooed me out of their village.

I spent the rest of that life futilely looking for love outside myself, and when I could not find it, I sank into a state of extreme rage and gut wrenching grief.

When I revisited the life 10 years ago, I finally released these layers of pent up emotions. The biggest insight that dawned on me is that the love was and is within me the whole time.

‘I AM’ transcends all emotional and mental states. ‘I AM’ holds only one emotionI AM is Unconditional Love – Love.

‘I AM’ is love – pure unadulterated unconditional love.

What this has translated to is that I am loving myself unconditionally. It’s taken quite a spirally, roundabout journey to get here (note to self for the next time : the fastest way to get from point A to point B is a straight line!) but I am here now.

How has this manifested practically?

  1. I am breaking free of the chains of conditioned beliefs that serve others as opposed to myself, and am learning more and flowing with what resonates more authentically with ‘I AM’.
  2. I am more aware of and have stronger boundaries against manipulation and / or inauthentic intentions, behaviours or personalities. The resonance causes me great discomfort, and apart from standing up for myself, I walk away from the person, thus walking away from any potential dramas that I do not want to be involved with
  3. I have stopped working at and giving away too much energy in the hopes to get love. Instead, I am now Being in a resonance that I enjoy Being in. In doing so, I am attracting those who share the same resonance that I am in, and those who do not share the same resonance are falling away.
  4. I am flowing with what my heart and ‘I AM’ desires as opposed to what I think I should be doing. Obligations do not feature in my to do list. Everything I do, I do with love and joy. ‘Work’ is no longer a four letter word activities that I look forward to with excitement. My work is the reflection of how I feel about myself inside.
  5. I take more time for myself – to relax, to go within to embody ‘I AM’, to just Be.

Unconditional Love within I AMIn the funny contradiction that is life, I am attracting what I desire by not doing or striving, but just by Being within ‘I AM’ resonance.

In embodying and Being ‘I AM’, my life is feeling more peaceful, complete and full of joy and love.

All because ‘I AM’ is an infinite source of unconditional love within.



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